HOPE FOR THE HOME: Be there for each other

Pastor/Husband: “I became the pastor of the largest church in my denomination in my state while in my early 40’s. However, I did so at great cost. I replaced humility and family with pride and personal ambition.”

Jerry: The above statements were shared with me one night after a session at our Hope for the Home Conferences. The gentleman who was a husband, father, and pastor had been sitting alone in the back of the room. When everyone left, he asked if he could speak with me. As we walked outside, he began to share his story through tears of brokenness. He said, “I read that you and your wife would be here tonight to share from your book, “44 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage.” He then related how as a young pastor he began to model his ministry after an older celebrated pastor with a mega church and a national organization. He said, “I duplicated what he did in the ministry. My desire was to pastor the largest church in my denomination in my home state. I achieved my goal two years ago but lost my family in the process. After coming home from a late-night meeting at church I was confronted with a large note on the refrigerator which said, ‘I have taken the children, and we are gone, and you won’t even miss us.” His personal dream became his nightmare. In the process of putting self-first, he had placed his wife and children last.

Becky: True success begins at home in private and not in the public sector. Too many husbands and wives, including pastors, steal time from those who love them the most to give it to those who love them the least. A lost opportunity can never be retrieved regardless of how many pictures the other spouse may have taken. Neglecting your spouse and children night after night for the sake of building your profession is a prescription for the collapse of both marriage and family. Few things are sadder than a spouse who is neglected and children who are ignored. Sending text messages is not the same as hearing each other’s voice. Passing each other going out the door is not the same as having that much needed date.

Jerry: It is all too easy for both significant and trivial matters to gradually overshadow the essential time that should be shared with those we love. Regardless of your profession, remember you made a choice to come together and a vow to stay together. Once again, we say, “Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it,” Psalm 127:1.       

Dr. Drace and his wife Becky are on American Family Radio weekdays at 4:20 PM (CT) and on Sundays at 5:35 PM (CT). Check out their resources for the family at HopefortheHome.org. Becky’s latest book, “The Bright Side of Blue” and Dr. Drace’s, “44 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage” offer biblical principles and timely advice for dealing with the challenges and trials of life. You may contact them at: hopeforthehome@juno.com.