DOOLEY NOTED: The prayer partner we need

Pray for me, pastor.

As you would expect, I hear those words quite often. People find tremendous comfort in knowing that someone will carry their burden before the Lord. When life becomes overwhelming, we want a prayer partner who cares about us, knows the Scripture, and takes prayer seriously.

Over the years, I have had numerous people who faithfully interceded on my behalf. A wife who loves me unconditionally. Parents who always stand by me. Mentors who poured into my life. Each one has been a blessing, but there is one prayer partner that rises above all the rest. 

What if I told you that God Himself prays for you? Would you believe it? Does that seem too good to be true? Remarkably, the Apostle Paul reveals that the Holy Spirit intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words (Rom. 8:26b). The born-again Christian never prays alone because the Spirit of God who indwells us stands ready to help as we talk to the Father (Rom. 8:15-17). 

But why do we need the Holy Spirit as a prayer partner? 

The Bible explains that the Spirit prays with us and for us because of our “weakness” (Rom. 8:26a). We are vulnerable, frail creatures who do not know what to pray for and often find it difficult to express our needs or feelings. The will of God often escapes us, and the work of God sometimes confuses us. Consequently, we do not know where to start when we pray. 

How should we pray when someone we love becomes seriously ill? What should we ask God to do for our children? How should we respond to an unexpected opportunity? What should we request when trouble turns our world upside down? Naturally, we want healing, provision, relief, comfort, and quick resolution. Nothing makes those desires wrong. But our preferences do not always match God’s purposes. In our weakness, we can be woefully ignorant of God’s will. 

Sometimes our problem is more visceral as we approach God. In our pain, we can be left speechless, unable to voice our deepest hurts and struggles. Maybe a diagnosis rocks us to the core. Perhaps someone we trust betrays us. Undoubtedly, unexpected hardships arise that test our faith. These are the groanings that are too deep for words (Rom. 8:26). The Holy Spirit sees beyond our confusion, carries our deepest wounds, and expresses the heart we struggle to communicate to the Father. He prays for us what we would pray for ourselves if we knew better and felt better.

Even more remarkable, though, is that no prayer offered by the Spirit ever contradicts the will of God (Rom. 8:27). He takes our confusion and dismay, our heartache and lament, our stubbornness and rebellion, even our shortcomings and sin, then filters them through the Lord’s perfect design for them all. When we cry, “God, change this!” the Spirit intercedes, “Father, accomplish Your will.” Sometimes both petitions point in the same direction, but often they do not. Even the greatest saints struggle at times.

Paul asked three times for the removal of his thorn in the flesh, but God had other plans (2 Cor. 12:7-9). Mary and Martha wanted Jesus to prevent Lazarus from dying, but Christ’s intentions were greater (John 11:1-46). The disciples certainly wanted a different outcome as they watched Jesus die on the cross, yet the divine agenda called for the Savior’s crucifixion (Mark 15:22-38). Surely, we can relate. Many of our prayers miss the mark, too. We regularly don’t know what to ask for, how to feel, or what God is doing. Yet, in every circumstance, struggle, and concern, the Spirit of Christ is there to pray according to what we do not yet know or understand. 

If this approach to prayer seems a bit risky, the Bible reassures us that God is actively working all events, whether they be burdensome or delightful, for our ultimate good (Rom. 8:28). Because the Holy Spirit intercedes according to the will of God, every prayer we offer reassures us that God consistently pursues our well-being. No matter what happens, you can trust the Lord to turn it into something beautiful. 

Imagine looking at the backside of a tapestry while an artist works. Threads run everywhere. Knots hang loosely. Colors collide without any apparent pattern. From that perspective, everything looks chaotic and unrelated. Walk around to the other side, however, and a beautiful picture emerges. That is Romans 8:28. When we see a tangled mess in front of us, God sees the finished masterpiece that’s ahead.

Certainly, everything that happens to us is not good. A broken marriage is not good. Burying someone you love is not good. Losing a job is not good. Disease that ravages your body is not good. Broken promises, angry words, bitter tears, and shattered dreams hurt us deeply. Yet, God sovereignly uses our worst moments and our deepest trials to bring about good. Sometimes we can see it in this life. In other instances, only the light of eternity will reveal His wonderful result. But in all matters, God hears our prayers and responds in ways that transform us into the image of His Son (Rom. 8:29).  

So, keep praying, even when you do not know what to say. Bring God your weakness. Bring Him your confusion. Bring Him your heartache. Bring Him your desires. Bring Him the groanings you cannot put into words. The Spirit is interceding. The Father is working. And God promises to make you more like Jesus.

Dr. Adam B. Dooley is pastor of Englewood Baptist Church in Jackson, TN, and author of Hope When Life Unravels. Contact him at adamdooley.org. Follow him on Twitter @AdamBDooley.